3 Years and Counting

(on becoming a Southerner and being okay with it)

It usually beings like this... "So - WHY did you move to GEORGIA?"

I have answered this question dozens of times since we moved here nearly three years ago. I remember standing in front of our house on that hot and muggy July day waiting (and sweating) for the moving truck to come rumbling down the street. After a few months of getting used to the accent, new places to eat and shop, and our neighborhood...things started to feel a little more like normal.

The simple answer to the WHY is that we came out here to visit my mother-in-law and family in the summer of 2007. We saw just how beautiful Atlanta is, how much there was to do with a family, that the housing prices were half of what they were in California, and it was a no-brainer. But though this is the answer I have given to many people since being here...it is not the whole truth. The fact is that God was preparing our hearts for a relocation since Briahnna and I got married in 2003. At first, we thought it would be overseas but it turns out the Lord had more for us to do in Pasadena. We were kept busy with our jobs (Mine at PUSD and Briahnna's at UCLA) and serving at our church (Foothills Community Church) and of course with the birth of our first born Jadyn. (On a side note...she will be turning 5 this month and I have to agree with everyone that it does go by fast)

It was uncanny how things kept falling into place for our move to Georgia. After the initial excitement of the possibility of relocation we agreed to spend a few months praying about it and make our decision around the new year. I had to tell my work pretty early on because various paperwork issues and obtaining references to find a job. I was confident in the school system because my brother-in-law (who has autism) attended schools in Cobb County and the district had an excellent reputation for special education. Briahnna's job was a little more tricky but with many hours of internet research she found a place where she was excited about. We came to visit in March of '08 and in one weekend secured a house and two jobs. Praise God!

Looking back...that may have been one of the times I have felt closest to God (preparing to move to Georgia). It seems like any time that I have ever been serious about seeking His will for my life...He has delivered. In addition, having Briahnna to share this journey with has been incredible. She inspires me to be a better man everyday and I am eternally grateful for her love and support as I try my best to lead our family in the right direction.

So...why are we here anyway? First and foremost I believe that our jobs are in line with the ministry that God prepared for us here. We have a heart for people who (in general) are misunderstood and marginalized (people with mental illness and severe disabilities). Sometimes I don't think that "counts" as a ministry but then I look at our paychecks (smile). To be very honest...we are blessed tremendously. From our house, to our cars, to our clothes, to our food, to our stuff...we have more than we really even need. We continue the process of scaling down and finding the simple life that we feel we are being called to. And not even just simplicity...but creating a culture in our family of giving to those who need it the most. I am encouraged and inspired by those in our small group who are trying to live this model out in everyday life.

On the way to a family camping trip in Savannah, Briahnna and I discussed just what God is trying to tell us now. Joining Northstar Church in Kennesaw has been part of our faith renewal. As some of you know, I have spent my whole life in the church and have participated in everything from Pentecostal to Methodist denominations. Experiencing a church that has community service and giving to those most in need be a top priority was a welcome change and for me restored some of my faith in the church body. Of course there is our small group (now known as The Outsiders) who at the core are our family (spiritual) apart from the only actual family we have in the area. We are all looking forward to seeing our Cali-Family on our trip back home this month. Three years does not seem that long now that I am on the other side of thirty. Even so...I miss home and I miss my family who I rarely get to talk to because of schedules and time differences. I thought I would never leave Southern California. But moving to another state has solidified my belief that it does not matter where you reside as long as you are connected to followers of Christ that are pursuing the same ends.

Perhaps God is trying change the way we have looked at the Christian life for so long...as "ME" focused. I know I have spent countless times sending up prayers that were only focused with what I was going through. I wanted my life to pass by without pain, suffering, or loss. But as we all know...that is not how life goes. And thank God for that...because without difficult times...I may never have known the grace and mercy of my Saviour. As our pastor says repeatedly "It's not about us." It is about loving our neighbor...the unloved...those who have no voice.

Perhaps God is trying change our priorities. Reflecting on the idea of the "pursuit of happiness" this 4th of July weekend...what kind of happiness are we trying to get? More money? More stuff? More success? More attention? If there is anything that we have learned in these last three years it is that the more we give away the happier we are. I am sure there will be another round up of things as we go through our house by summer's end that will go in the donation pile.

Perhaps God is trying to change how we think of the word "Christian". For many people, unfortunately, this word does not evoke feelings of love, compassion, and charity but of judgement, ridicule, and a particular political party. I wonder how many people who are agnostic/atheist or otherwise have not necessarily rejected Christ but His followers and what they do in His name. We need to reclaim what it means to be a follower of Christ and take His words in the Bible seriously that the most important things are to love Him and love other people.

When I was an Resident Advisor in college (APU) we went on something called a "walkabout" before the school year began. We backpacked 10 days up in the Ansel Adams Wilderness (near Yosemite). For 2 of those days we had a time of solitude. We each found a place to camp out and spent two nights by ourselves...all we could bring was a Bible and a journal and a pen...no sleeping bag. This was one of the few times I have felt God speaking to me clearly. He said (not audibly but in my heart) "if you want to know Me than know my Son". I know this is a simple enough concept but when I really think about what this means for me and my family it is a weighty matter. Jesus should be my focus and the more I know Jesus...the more I know my Heavenly Father and the more my life will look like Him.

So...I guess it all comes back to the Sunday School answer of "Jesus" (smile). So...thank you for sticking with me until the end. I may have lost some of you half way down the post but that is okay. I have come to like Georgia and the South, though I had many prejudices before coming here to visit. The accent has grown on me and so has the food...I have even found a couple of good Mexican places to eat. The scenery is gorgeous (if you don't believe me you have to come for a visit). And next time I get asked WHY we picked up and moved across the country...I'll ask if they want the long version or the short version. The short version being...Jesus.

Just Fun

My past few posts have been of a more serious nature, more related to thoughts, ideas, musings, etc. This post is just a catch-up on the fun we've been having in the midst of all the thoughts, ideas, musings, etc.

It is officially summer as of yesterday but for us, summer began with Tim's last day of the school year. We are now completely on summer schedule. This summer we actually sat down and planned it all out in an attempt to be more intentional about our time usage ( I know, can I be anymore type A). Of course things have come up, plans have changed, but over-all it has really helped. We are trying to have a theme for each day of the week including science, the arts, history, community service and music.

So far, we've hit up the zoo (science), went through a lot of stuff for donation (community service), Tim started teaching Jadyn piano lessons (music), put together activity packs for the children's hospital that Isaiah was at as an infant and dropped them off (community service), decorated lunch bags for our church's summer lunch program (art and community service), not to mention our family camping trip near Savannah with our good friends the Furrs (science, history and music all in one!) With lots more planned of course.

I've updated the picasa sight to include pictures from some of these things if you want to check them out.
https://picasaweb.google.com/lh/myphotos

Here are some from our camping trip. Hope you all are enjoying summer too.

Oh yeah, and I turned 32 yesterday so Happy Birthday to me!

Sacrifice (or The Price of a Calling)

I'm not going to lie, this past weekend was a rough one for me. It was a working weekend (every other one is). And like most working weekends I was feeling sorry for myself and bitter towards all those who were not in my situation. Then came the message at church on Sunday. Written just for me, I'm sure of it.

Point #1 "Always remember why you work"

Friday night I missed out on this.

Jadyn "graduated" from her Pre-K class, something that will only happen once in her little life. There were performances by each class and presentations of certificates by the teachers. Thanks to our handy Flip video camera I was able to watch most of it when I got home from work. But still, I wasn't there. I tried for weeks to get the night off but it just didn't happen. (I could have called in sick but that goes against sermon point #2 "Keep your integrity")

I wanted to be there to tell her how proud I was of her, to grab her up and give her a huge hug and kiss her on the cheek. To dance along with her and clap for her. Instead I pre-recorded a message for her and hugged and kissed her the next morning and asked her to teach me the fun dances. Not ideal, but we survived and made the best of it.

The next day it was a friends double birthday party. Here's what I missed then.

Seriously?  Look at that face! I laughed so hard I almost cried when Tim e-mailed me this picture. Not to mention the time with friends I missed out on (and delicious food!)

And then Sunday came, and not a day too soon.

Point #1 "Remember why you work"

OK, so why do I work? Why do I not stay full time at home? Why do I sacrifice time with my husband working opposite shifts than him, weekends and holidays? Why do I sacrifice time with friends and seemingly the rest of the world who works on a 9-5 schedule? Why do I sacrifice sleep (one of my most favorite things)? And the list goes on and on.

The answer that I was reminded of Sunday morning (whispered ever so quietly in my soul) was, "because I've called you to". No other reason. I work for Him. At home, I work for Him. At my job, I work for Him. He has called me to both.

Maybe the night that Jadyn was graduating something I said to one of my patients will be the thing down the road they will hold on to the next time they want to harm themselves, or the next time they want to get high, or the next time they feel the world closing in on them. If I don't love them, who will? Mental Illnesses are generally not part of the heralded diseases. You don't see many 5K for Schizophrenia or Bipolar Disorder. But for some reason God has shown me His heart for these people and has asked me to work with them. And so I do.

I admit that lately it has been begrudgingly. Which is why I probably needed the reminder "Remember why you work"

Really I have the best of both worlds, I get to work in an area God has gifted me in (psychiatry) and then I get to "work at" an area I am not so gifted in (motherhood), and I'm going to try to be thankful for it all. I'd like to think that the kids are getting the best of both worlds too, me in the morning and Tim at night.

And who am I kidding, for as much as I feel sorry for myself about the things I miss, there is so much more that I get to enjoy. (case in point: the very weekend before we had a family getaway in Chattanooga)

Rolling in the Grass

Rowing Partners

Whispering sweet nothings

Coming in for a hug landing! And I'm the landing strip

And let me tell you, that time is all the more appreciated. So I repent and remind myself "Why do I work?" The same reason I do anything, because of Love, so others may experience His glory. As my wise pastor Mike always says "It's not about you!" I'm not saying the bitterness and resentment won't happen again (like maybe on Father's Day or 4th of July, both of which I will be working) but I'll try to remember this simple truth and suck it up.

Lent Conclusion: The Journey is Just Beginning

Easter. The glorious conclusion to the Lenten season. As people throughout the ages have professed "He is risen, He is risen indeed!" We spent Holy week doing special things with the kids each day including buying gifts for our neighbors, washing each others feet, planting things. It was a very precious time (some pics below).

I wanted, and had intentioned to, write a post about all that I learned. I tried and failed (I just deleted lines and lines of writing). It was too much, too deep to put in writing adequately. (if you want to know more you can ask me, I'd be happy to tell you all about it). What I can say is that I started out our Lent fast as I do every year, doing it because that is what we do, we fast. I was not prepared to be changed forever. But I am. The person I started out as, less than two months ago, I no longer am. My thoughts have changed, my focus and purposes have changed, my way of seeing things/people has changed. It seems like an eternity when I look back. And I hope that my life reflects all that has occurred. I hope I speak differently, I hope I act differently, I hope I treat people differently.

I'm not saying that parts of the old me aren't there, for example we just spent $15 at Caribou coffee yesterday just for the pleasure of it (but I did feel an adequate sense of guilt and thought about all the other ways that money could have been used, so it was the old mixed with the new). But for now, the new me is a happier, more contented me over-all. (aren't we always when we are living the life we were made to live) There have been a few hiccups/distractions/derailments already, but the detours seem shorter and it seems to be taking less time to get back on track than it used to.

What I can profess is that through many different avenues (my readings, church sermons, people I was talking to) the words of Jesus spoke truth again to me in the simple and pure way they did when I first heard them, before it all was twisted and tainted and marred by life and experience, etc. And so I claim again the title of Red Letter Christian (in reference to the words of Jesus being in red in some Bibles) and try to live accordingly.

In tangibles ways this has manifested in our home being transformed into something that is more "us" and less like a catalog or showroom. Our time, resources, finances have been overhauled and are now being used so much more purposefully and intentionally. We have broadened our sense of "family". I look at people I am interacting with and remind myself they are God's creation made in his image and I should treat them that way. I hope it shows, that I am not the same. I hope that less of me shows through and more of Him. And that's it in a nutshell (wherever that phrase came from).

please enjoy some of my favorite Easter photos and our newest home projects

Our Holy Week "worship space"

Washing of the feet

Naturally died eggs (beet, onion, red cabbage, tumeric)

Easter finery

Aquarium mural, everyone contributed

Beginnings of our green wall

Saved most of these from Lowes clearance section

Repurposed Ikea wood

Setting our minds

And we continue our journey. We are approaching Palm Sunday and I have to say that these past few weeks of Lent have felt like the passing of years. But only because so much growth and change has occurred. It remains hard for me to put words to what is happening in our hearts and souls and minds (we hope).

One thing we have felt strongly about is focus. Where is our focus and where do we want the focus of our family to be? In discovering this we decided to use our home and the empty spaces we have to serve as visual reminders. Here is what we've come up with so far, with plans for much more.

Kids interactive, magnetic prayer boards

Family Verse, above the TV on purpose

Inspirational lyrics

It all reminds me of why I got my tattoo years ago (yes, just the one). I wanted a daily reminder of who I was and where I had come from and who was to be given credit for all of that. Well now our family has daily reminders, loud and clear, setting our minds on The Good.

Out of the Depths

A Room With A View (and other Spring Break activities)

Spring Break 2011

Being that we couldn't spend money during the week we took a minimalist approach this year, but it was still fantastic.

We did take advantage of our Sunday spending day and got a great deal on a room at the Westin Peachtree Plaza downtown. All the kids need is a hotel with soft beds and a pool and they are in heaven. Jadyn now refers to it as "that hotel that we lived at". They put us on the 53rd floor and the view was phenomenal as you will soon see. What we did not realize was that we would be sharing downtown not only with thousands of girls volleyball tournament competitors, but the Wrestlemania fans as well. I tried looking for The Rock, but no luck.

And since it is our new fun free activity, we managed to get in some city geocaching which was super fun, very creative hiding places.







Tuesday we hit up the Botanical Gardens for a special "members only" night. All the bulbs were in bloom,  tulips and daffodils galore. And the orchid exhibit was in its final days. SO much inspiration in one place.

Other than that, we hung out close to home, enjoyed each others company and spent time creating and dreaming. But more of that  to come.

Spring!!! And the big payoff

Spring is just exhilarating to me, simply put. And here are some of the reasons why... in picture form ...from our property.

I know right!

So in honor of the first day of Spring we threw a little shin dig at our place, ate some good food, planted some seeds with the kids, watched the Duke vs Michigan State game, and the kids graced us with an amazing puppet show after which we attempted to get a group photo.

The blue-haired whale (aka Greyson)

Response to the Blue Haired Whale

"Did my kid just say that?"

So the real big payoff is the amazing community of people we are blessed to journey with right now BUT I wanted to show you the fruits of our lawn redo labor. If you remember, last spring we put some serious sweat and tears into redoing our front lawn. Here is the big payoff...glorious isn't it? We've had fun running around barefoot in it and rolling around too. Good stuff.

Spring 2010

Spring 2011

The Man behind the Green